My "what's next"

I struggle to find the word to describe the past 3 1/2 months. Chaotic, liberating, depressing, frustrating, second-guessing, invigorating, refreshing, healthy, cleansing, life changing.

One word just won’t suffice.

Leaving a job after 22 years where I got to work with good friends, collaborate on meaningful projects and surround myself with familiarity was uncharacteristic for me, especially because I didn’t yet know how all the future career puzzle pieces would fit together. I’ve never left a job without having another one lined up, except when I quit Hardee’s to move to college. That’s been a minute, as the kids say these days.

I grew a beard this summer because it seemed like the thing to do since I wasn’t going to be on television every day. It was mostly because of my 7-year-old daughter, Lyla’s, request.

Thanks to my wife, Emily, for taking my new “head shot,” which reflects the change. I assume that she must have used some type of filter setting, right? There’s NO way that I can have so much white in my beard!

In all seriousness, there were some dark moments this summer. Did I make a mistake by declining to sign a new contract with my former employer? What about a paycheck? Did I just put my family’s financial health in jeopardy? Would I really be able to build something more rewarding, more flexible and better for our family’s future? Was that even possible? Sure, I had ideas and put a lot of thought into them. But that’s no guarantee that any of them would work.

My extended circle of “framily” (I consider my closest friends to be like family) must have dreaded seeing my text, phone call or email coming in. “Doesn’t this guy have it figured out yet?” I pictured them thinking over those many weeks.

Self-doubt can be a powerful enemy.

But several friends in Iowa, two dear friends near D.C. and a mentor/friend in Dallas helped get me through this. That friend in Dallas rescued me when I called him with a request that’s foreign from me. “I really need you to just listen for a minute,” I asked of him.

That was the day that it felt like the summer had been an epic failure and the ideas that I had for the future (that close friends assured me were solid) were not progressing like they should be. He rescued me from drowning.

I can’t even count how many times the husband and wife, super-friend couple in D.C. helped keep me pointing forward. So much wisdom. So much thoughtfulness.

And then the Iowa framily. One in particular, a longtime colleague of mine, has this unique ability to offer a strong ear, hand up, good heart and steady focus for anything that ever troubles me. This career evolution was no different. I treasure his sage advice.

There was another friend who offered to meet for coffee that instead turned into a four-hour career coaching session. Another couple treated me to lunch but provided far more nourishment than a meal. One friend who I’ve known for 20 years is always there for me as we brainstorm how we can make a bigger impact.

These books helped, too. Jim Massey, who authored the book on the bottom of the stack, recommended two in the pile above his.

For me, Jim’s book stressed the need to trust your instincts and act on what you know is right for the future…and to lead. Simon Sinek’s book boils it down to this: “Why” are you doing what you do? So simple but so profound. Reid Hoffman’s book provides so much guidance for reinventing yourself and adapting to changes.

I saw a social media post about Ben McDougal’s book, which is why I bought it. And apparently, I did need his book, despite the title. I really appreciated the advice on navigating how to prioritize (and the cost of) building several endeavors at once.

And, of course, there’s my family. My kids dealt with the emotional highs and lows through this process. I will never forget the extra time that I got to spend with them this summer and the travel adventures that we had.

And I’m sure that I tested Emily’s patience to an unfair level. Fortunately, her love is limitless. I was reminded why she has become such an exceptional leader, while leading an organization that’s saving babies all over the world.

Getting her husband through his mid-life crisis — uh, I mean, mid-life “re-invention” — was all in a day’s work for her.

I wish there were stronger words than “thank you” that I could say to everyone who has helped me. Their coffees, messages, conversations and company got me through this and helped me build my future. It wasn’t easy. But I know that I’m lucky. Extremely lucky. It was my decision to leave my old job. I didn’t get laid off or fired like a handful of colleagues did a few years ago. We also had some money in the bank to get us through the summer. Very blessed.

And, of course, I had this column. This has been such an unexpected, creative outlet and a cherished connection with readers across the country. I’m so grateful for your support, your messages and your trust in what we are building here.

O.K., so I’ve really buried the lede here. There are two new parts to my “what’s next.” I helped Steve Bruere, the president of Clive, Iowa - based Peoples Company and his staff design and launch the American Farmland Owners’ newsletter. It’s a weekly collection of in-depth stories, analysis and interviews on how agricultural industry trends, politics, economic forces, climate challenges and technology will impact farmland owners across our country.

Here’s the first edition.

There’s another big part of my journalism “what’s next” that I expect to announce in the next few days after everything is finalized. It’s the culmination of three months of sharing ideas, developing a new concept and exploring the possibilities. I can’t wait.

Stay tuned:)

Thanks to all of you for your support. I’m excited for what’s ahead!

(Below is the ever-growing list of independent writers who are part of the Iowa Writers’ Collaborative. Please consider subscribing.)

• Nicole Baart: This Stays Here, Sioux Center 

• Laura Belin: Iowa Politics with Laura Belin, Windsor Heights

• Doug Burns: The Iowa Mercury, Carroll

• Dave Busiek: Dave Busiek on Media, Des Moines

• Iowa Writers’ Collaborative, Roundup

• Steph Copley: It Was Never a Dress, Johnston

• Art Cullen: Art Cullen’s Notebook, Storm Lake

• Suzanna de Baca: Dispatches from the Heartland, Huxley

• Debra Engle: A Whole New World, Madison County

• Arnold Garson: Second Thoughts, Okoboji and Sioux Falls 

• Julie Gammack: Julie Gammack’s Iowa Potluck, Des Moines and Okoboji

• Joe Geha: Fern and Joe, Ames

• Jody Gifford: Benign Inspiration, West Des Moines

• Rob Gray: Rob Gray’s Area, Ankeny

• Nik Heftman: The Seven Times, Los Angeles and Iowa

• Beth Hoffman: In the Dirt, Lovilla

• Dana James: New Black Iowa, Des Moines

• Pat Kinney: View from Cedar Valley, Waterloo

• Fern Kupfer: Fern and Joe, Ames

• Robert Leonard: Deep Midwest: Politics and Culture, Bussey

• Letters from Iowans, Iowa

• Darcy Maulsby, Keepin’ It Rural, Calhoun County

• Tar Macias: Hola Iowa, Iowa

• Alison McGaughey, The Inquisitive Quad Citizen, Quad Cities

• Kurt Meyer: Showing Up, St. Ansgar

• Wini Moranville: Wini’s Food Stories, Des Moines

• Jeff Morrison: Between Two Rivers, Cedar Rapids

• Kyle Munson: Kyle Munson’s Main Street, Des Moines

• Jane Nguyen: The Asian Iowan, West Des Moines

• John Naughton: My Life, in Color, Des Moines

• Chuck Offenburger: Iowa Boy Chuck Offenburger, Jefferson and Des Moines

• Barry Piatt: Piatt on Politics Behind the Curtain, Washington, D.C.

• Macey Spensley: The Midwest Creative, Norwalk

• Larry Stone: Listening to the Land, Elkader

• Mary Swander: Mary Swander’s Buggy Land, Kalona

• Mary Swander: Mary Swander’s Emerging Voices, Kalona

• Cheryl Tevis: Unfinished Business, Boone County

• Ed Tibbetts: Along the Mississippi, Davenport

• Teresa Zilk: Talking Good, Des Moines